Starting Over - New Idea

My newest, biggest idea/project is a medieval/fantasy story. I have to say...I'm simply loving it. I've sort of been experimenting with different genres and "eras" in which to write, trying to learn which might be my best, and I'd decided I'd go back to my childhood: Fantasy - what use to fill my thoughts both day and night. I figured that was my "first love" (haha), I use to love writing about it, why not try going back and see how I do?

I might've bit off more than I could chew. The book I'm planning is huge - lots and lots of characters, but to be honest, I can't write a story unless I have many characters. My personality screams "NO" at such a thing, usually I get panicked if there is too much going on, but when I'm writing, I have to have a lot going on or nothing works inside my brain. Whenever I get in my writing zone, I'm a completely different person. ...Anyways. Back to the story. I had originally thought that I would have several different books, one for each character, but after development of both characters and stories, I decided it would be better for them to stay in one book to tie everything together and better show how each character relates to the other. (of course, I'm already planning a sequel dealing with the next generation of these characters, but we will NOT get into that!)

The thing about this story: I feel a connection with it that I never felt with my other stories. I'm not sure if it's just a sort of "connection" with my childhood, bringing memories back, or if maybe I really have something here. When I was in the very very first stages of development of the idea, I nearly gave up. I shut my laptop rather harshly and just flung my head back to look at the ceiling (I'm sure I had quite the scowl on my face.) I said to myself, "That's it. This isn't going to work, I can't do this!" Right after that last word, one of my characters popped into my head. I shot back up and thought, "But I can't abandon her!" (Of course then I thought maybe I should visit a psychiatrist, but decided against it since they are rather expensive.) Again, the connection - I FELT a bond to this character, a love for this character that rendered the notion of abandoning the story impossible. And so...I am now writing the story. I write parts as they come to me, whether they fit exactly in that slot in the story or not, and if I feel writer's block creeping up in one scene, I move onto the next, because otherwise I know I'll bring myself down to the dirt. I plan on writing this way for the most part and then going in and filling the blanks at the end. I'm just so excited. It has a level of realism to it, but of course it is fantasy, so I can do whatever I want ;) So anyways, I'm very excited for this story and VERY determined to stay true and not abandon it.

"The story...must be a conflict, and specifically, a conflict between the forces of good and evil within a single person." - Maxwell Anderson